Vedagna Vemula Week #4 I Think I Just Fell In Love..
I am definitely the textbook definition of a quiet person, and it doesn't help that I'm an overthinker and unnecessarily sassy to myself. I mean, you would just hear me say hi and politely hang around in your peripheral vision while my brain, like the backstabber it is, immediately starts judging me like: “Omg who says ‘hi’ like that??”, “that was an octave higher than socially acceptable” and then it hits me with a “I’m not mad just a little disappointed of your social skills that are comparable to a dead raccoon”. “Really brain? Why can't you be a team player for once?”
Even as I am writing this, my brain is constantly telling me to fix those sentences, asking me if I am oversharing things and ordering me to drink water and get some snacks (“ok, you overgrown toddler, I will eat that snickers bar. Shut up.” “Did you seriously add ‘shut up' just for dramatic flair? On a blog? Just typing it out? Are you for real?” “YESS!! NOW GET OUT OF MY HEAD, BRAIN!”).
Because my brain and I are such best friends, I often miss an opportunity to contribute to a conversation or discussion because I am too busy reframing and restructuring what I wanted to say and take too long for it to fit in the flow of the conversation. Hence, all those thoughts are inevitably stuck in my head and continue to haunt me like a sad clown (“Do sad clowns haunt people?” “I don't know” “Then why..?” “ARE YOU WRITING OR AM I??” “Geez, okay, calm down”).
Writing blogs has been a very delightful surprise (“You sound like a Victorian woman lol, who even says ‘delightful’ anyway.” “(-_-)” ). I was honestly just going to treat blogs as just another assignment that I would not put any heart into and finish it brain dead. Except, since the second blog (“And you best” “True”), I started to genuinely enjoy blogging—to the point I am planning on making a diary of sorts.
Just like how my younger self refused to believe in ‘fUn wRiTinG’, my older-younger self refused to write anything that was not fantasy; that led me to never keeping a diary or writing anything contemporary because I experienced and keep experiencing it. If a memory mattered to me then it would stick with me till the end and if I forgot it then I don't need that memory anymore (“Including your homework?” “Stop exposing me”). But now I am starting to see why people write in their diaries. It's a little silly that it took me so long to realize writing about ‘boring things’ could be so fun.
Moral of the story? I think I just fell in love with a way of writing I used to despise ("Holy enemies to lovers arc"). It helped me express myself without judgement (“HELLO?!” “You don't count” “So YOU don't count?” “Stop keeping words in my mouth”). Keeping yourself in a box and actively limiting your experiences will only leave things you didn't experience (“DUH??” “I'M TRYING TO CHANNEL MY ‘UNCLE IROH’ ENERGY OKAY?! HEAR ME OUT!”).
Try new things that are out of your comfort zone! Even the ones you did not like. You are changing constantly as you grow up and who knows? you might end up with a new hobby.
Happy writing and exploring! :)
Ps: did you know that the mini socratic seminar we had about the chicken documentary gave me the idea to write this blog? Inspiration really can come from anything.
Hey Veda! First off, I just wanted to say how much I like your sentence structure and your content. I really like the fact that you utilize question marks and colons to help your blog flow much smoother than what it would be without it. This blog was very interesting to me because I was visually attracted to every sentence you wrote. Another thing that I really like about your blog is your constant use of embedded quotes. To me it shows a deeper understanding of your own thought process and I think it's very mature of you to write about that. I can relate to how you overthink about what you say. When I was younger, the exact experience that you were talking about. My brain was constantly overthinking and critiquing my own actions and decisions. It was not a good time, but I think I am past that, which is the most important thing. I second about liking to blog and not to treat it as an overly long assignment. I think it serves two good purposes. First, it helps you develop your thoughts and emotions better and it helps you find and learn more about yourself. Second, it improves your writing style because the constant writing forces you to improve each time. I think my style of writing has drastically improved since my freshman year and that is why I took AP lang. Lastly, I also fervently believe that it is important to leave your comfort zone because it makes you do better. It improves you because it creates discipline within yourself and it also allows you to overcome fears. I think your blog was very interesting and I appreciate what you do. Smiles!
ReplyDeleteHello, Veda. I first want to comment on how interesting your juxtaposition in sentence structure is! Part of the reason this was such an entertaining read was because your inner thoughts are contrasted with your outward writings, and they add to the humor of this piece thanks to their relatability. It has really impressed me how you have grown to love writing blogs after initial dislike, and more in depth how you overthink certain things and can recognize it. When I was younger, I did not even know I was overthinking until someone told me. It really is interesting how we tend to think about everything because our minds constantly reevaluate the situation in picoseconds. Your use of brackets to disclose inner thoughts and your brain's overthinking really helps the piece flow and it serves to differentiate the two, which is very helpful. I agree, blogging has been very fun (Thanks Mrs. Smith!) because of our freedom to choose about what we write about. Sure, it can be daunting to think of writing topics, but I feel it is precisely because we have the freedom to choose that we can make these pieces as entertaining as they are. Free from the usual constraints, we have seen very interesting texts made by ourselves, and so we learn more about each other and ourselves as writers, even as students in the class. Well done on this humurous (but very true) read. Cheers.
ReplyDeleteHi,Veda! Firstly, I want to say that it is totally fine and great to think a lot before starting speaking. I had the same exact thing in middle school. I always think about whether or not I am making a fool of myself before trying to do any type of public speaking. I think that I slowly dropped that mindset because I stopped caring about it too much. I think that it is great that you really enjoyed writing blogs and how you step outside of your comfort zone for writing fantasy stories. I think that I am not a person that is very great at that, but it is always great to try something new in life; like you discovering that you liked writing blogs a lot. Moreover, I still really appreciate your way of blog writing; by adding a lot of internal dialogue and psychological description, you made your blog such an interesting read. I know it is a small thing, but I also really like your usage of Capitalized's letters to express your own emotions regarding something; it provides a visual punch for the readers and it is also just fun to read. I wish you a wonderful quarter 2 and a great time writing blogs about America and Language!
ReplyDeleteHi, Vedagna! I’m glad to discover that I’m not the only one that talks to my brain; sometimes, it’s hard to get it to stop making comments about what is or is not socially acceptable. In particular, I find the dialogue that you exchange with your brain a specifically nice touch. I see that your syntax is becoming more complicated, and your parenthesis coupled with bolded and nonbolded characters allow your dialogue to stand out from among your general narration.
ReplyDeleteYour sarcasm seems to ooze through the pages as you describe how ‘helpful’ your brain can be at times. I also tend to overthink things a little bit too much, from planning how my day will go to guessing possible responses that a person might have at my speech. Some good friends of mine have taught me to go with the first thing that comes to mind (which can be extremely frustrating if my brain tells me what to do before I can consider things), and I’ve found it helpful in making adventurous, if not well-informed decisions.
To conclude, your conclusion really sums up how we can change over time. The first time I was told to write a short story in 7th grade, I broke down crying. Now I write them for fun.
I really appreciated your anecdote to Uncle Iroh, and would like to quote: “Good times become good memories, but bad times become good lessons.”